Home > Stim Cycle #11 > Back with Bill

Back with Bill

Today, instead of having the 20 week ultrasound appointment I originally had scheduled, I had an appointment with Bill about getting back on the old IVF roller coaster.  I didn’t cry much, which I ‘m very proud of.  I worried he’d think I was getting too old and would just send me away or say we could try to transfer the 1 frozen embryo we had.  However instead I get to do exactly what I wanted to do: a fresh flare cycle.

Ever since the miscarriage I’ve just wanted to get right back into IVF.  Unfortunately having our little Blobby only makes me want to have a baby more.  I felt like asking Bill to bring the frozen embryo around for my D&C.  I know that wouldn’t have worked, but that’s how I felt at the time.  I hated having an empty uterus again.  I felt so very empty.

I don’t know if it’s cruel or good, but my body seems to have recovered from the miscarriage much faster than I have.  I believe I ovulated 2 weeks ago Friday, so in the next day or two I should have my period.  As this is a flare cycle, I start sniffing Synarel on day 1 and jabbing Gonal-F on day 2.  So things are starting again quickly.  But not quickly enough for me; I still feel empty.

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